Let me see: four times five is twelve, and four times six is thirteen, and four times seven is -- oh dear! I shall never get to twenty at that rate!

I always forget how many days it has been since I last blogged. As the semester nears its end, it gets more and more difficult to find time to just relax. Though I really don't have the time right now, I cannot seem to concentrate on my school work and therefore thought I'd do something productive-- even if I'm the only one who thinks it productive at all.

The days, nights, and weeks are going by faster and faster. I just realized that nine days from today is Thanksgiving! It seems like Halloween was only yesterday and Fall Break was the day before that. All of a sudden I wish time would slow down. I am getting closer and closer to my graduation, and it's very intimidating. My dearest friend from high school, ShaCarol, visited me this past weekend and we spent quite a bit of time talking about "after college." It seemed like just a few weeks before we had been talking about "after high school." On top of all that, my grandfather just had surgery and is recovering, my sister is having a baby, so many friend are getting married... it feels like we're so much older. It feels like we're nearing more weddings and baby showers and job interviews and... all that stuff that means we're really growing up. Scary, isn't it?

Clark and I struggle with time. Since we got married so young, it always feels like everything else should happen when we're younger, too. It feels like everything else has taken forever to catch up with our married status. Clark keeps saying he's afraid we're never going to get to the next step. It's how we've both been feeling lately. Perhaps it's because we're so close that things seem so far away. Thanksgiving and Christmas are just around the corner, but graduation, new car, sufficient furniture, a new computer, and careers seem like they're so far off. These things that we've been waiting for for three years are creeping up on us, and yet they seem like they're not going to happen for another three years.

I hadn't written lately because I wasn't sure what to write about. While school is taking over and I finally registered for my last semester and we've had family and friends popping up with news and Clark has been working full time... it still seems like I don't have a valid excuse for not writing. While before I thought I'd graduate and take a break from everything and focus mainly on writing my book(s), I think I may actually want to try to get a job first. I don't know. We shall see. My mind is constantly changing. I don't want to get a job if I cannot get one that involves my degree. I know that's absurd to say, because so many people these days aren't getting jobs that reflect what they went to school for... but still. One can dream, right?

Well, back to school work.

Begin at the beginning and go on till you come to the end: then stop.

It has been one of those weeks. Constant stops and gos, if you know what I mean. If only this weekend was one I could spend curled up by the fire with hot tea just relaxing. As you can probably guess, it's not. Such a pity, too, because it's snowing outside and snow always makes me want to relax even more. I'm not lying, I promise. See:

Absolutely craziness. This is Luna, in case you didn't know.

So, as I said, it's been a hectic week full of tests, group projects, plans with friends, cleaning house, homework in general, exercising, and trying not to lose my mind. Today I decided to spoil myself for a week well done and go shopping. Of course, the one time I designate a shopping trip to be all about me I find a bunch of things for other people. Well, no matter. I did make it out with one sweater that was on sale at the Gap outlet and a new thing of OPI nail polish. I know I shouldn't be spending money, but every now and then I feel like girls deserve it.

Yesterday I made it through a five hour school day and then went to Jessica's apartment to hang out. It was so nice to sit and have someone cook for me, which Clark has not done in a while, and just socialize. Afterwards we went and saw the university's production of Romeo and Juliet, which was wonderful. I have to admit I felt a little bit bitter not being a part of it, but c'est la vie. I never realized how incredibly whiny and annoying Romeo is as a character! Don't get me wrong, I still cried when they both died... but sometimes getting older makes things seem more ridiculous and less romantic. Well, some things-- not all things at all.

School is taking over everything. I've had to cancel several plans due to projects and papers that take way longer than I imagined them to. I guess it's my own fault for taking some difficult courses as electives and saving some difficult courses for last. I met with my advisor on Wednesday and he told me I was crazy for taking 18 hours my last semester. He advised me not to take too many writing courses, which I kind of smirked at and then told him what I'm planning: New Testament, 19th Century American Literature, Medieval Theatre History and Literature, Introduction to Film, Ethnic Literary Studies, Pilates, and Running Crew. He asked me if I was trying to commit suicide. I said no... I just don't take the easy way with anything. Although I have learned from this semester that isn't always the smartest thing to do, next semester is my last so I may as well continue on with my ridiculous antics and take difficult courses. What fun would it be for me not to learn anything my last semester of college? It wouldn't be any fun. That's my answer.

In case any of you readers hadn't heard, another thing is finally announce-able: MY OLDER SISTER. KATIE MITCHELL, AND HER HUSBAND, TIM MITCHELL, ARE GOING TO HAVE A BABY!!! The baby is due June 14th and I am beyond excited to be an auntie. I've already made a list of things to spoil the expecting parents and my future niece or nephew with. I told my sister I'm going to send monthly packages-- and I intend to keep that promise! Since Clark and I have some time before we even mention the idea of having kids, it's nice to be able to spoilt my sister and her family!

Once again this blog seems inadequate, but I am spending my Friday afternoon relaxing, so I intend to continue to do just that... after I exercise.

Now, I give you fair warning, either you or your head must be off, and that in about half no time! Take your choice!

November first. Can you believe it? It's November and all I can think about is getting to Thanksgiving and then Christmas. Clark informed me that there are 54 days until Christmas. That means there are 24 days until Thanksgiving, right? Oh, bother. It's insane. What's bad is I'm sitting here thinking of all the Christmas shopping I need to do/ to start. We're so behind this year. It has been rough, so that's a good reason, but even still I wish I was a little more on top of things. I know some people that are completely finished with their Christmas shopping. How do they do that?

School is driving me insane. After research, it seems next semester is going to be at about the same level. I know... last year. I wish I had listened to some advice and taken more hours other semesters so I would have fewer these semesters... but c'est la vie. It seems switching advisors every semester didn't help me much. Each one kept telling me different things. Well, as long as I get the classes I'm hoping to get there should be no problems with graduating on time. If I don't... I'll figure that out when the time comes.

Lately I've been feeling like I'm losing my head. I'm not sure how to interpret the feeling for you, other than I know if I don't get a real vacation soon I may burst. Talking to my mother yesterday I realized that Thanksgiving really isn't going to be much of a vacation, because Clark and I aren't going to visit until Wednesday and may have to turn right around Friday. What fun is that? If I'm at our house I guarantee I will be cleaning, not relaxing. I suppose that's what happens when you enter the real world and can't be choosey about your jobs at the moment.

Unfortunately, other than me losing my mind, not much is going on. Everyone is counting down to something because the next month of school is so full of projects and papers. After Thanksgiving is exams, so I'm not sure which period is better... all I can tell you is that Thanksgiving cannot come soon enough. I do hate wishing time away, though. It seems like such a waste after the time has passed and you look back and wonder where on earth it went. Like today I'm wondering what happened to October. It wasn't as cold as it normally is, we didn't get snow, we actually had an autumn... so what's next? It hasn't been this way in around two years or so. Strange.

Well, I suppose I must be off before I lose my head. Studying for Hebrew Scripture and writing for Creative Writing are waiting for me. I've made my choice ;)... what's yours?

I wonder if I've been changed in the night? Let me think. Was I the same when I got up this morning?

I apologize for the lack of posts for the past ten days or so. It's been absolutely insane. What with school work, visitors, life in general, and so forth... I've just been overwhelmed. I don't foresee it stopping until Thanksgiving, either. I really need to suck it up and focus on the important things instead of taking time to slack off. I have been slacking, to be honest. I have so much studying and so much work to do and I've just been waiting to do it until last minute. I really need some time to just sit and relax, but truly I need more time to sit and be productive. If only I wasn't so tired all the time. It would be a lot easier if that wasn't the case.

I know, I'll stop complaining.

This week has been full of ups and downs, and it somewhat surprises me it's nearly over. The end of October is Sunday, and for some reason I'm very glad of it. Normally October is my absolute favorite month, and this year we actually had an Autumn so it made it even more enjoyable, but it was tiring. Please don't get me wrong, those of you that visited or whom I visited. I loved your company and wouldn't play out the month any other way. I'm just exhausted from school, and so ready for this semester to be over. If only to get the next one over with as well.

I'm ready for Thanksgiving. I know it's not too far off and it's horrible to wish for time to go faster, but I'm so ready for a vacation. Even if that vacation means going somewhere warmer than here, I will be glad to have it. I just want family, food, and relaxing. What could be better than that?

This morning it's the coldest it's been in a while. I woke up to 37 degree weather, and checked the ten day forecast only to find snow in it for next Friday. Who knows if it will actually happen, but I am hoping that it gets that cold but with no snow. I'm sincerely praying it doesn't snow until after Thanksgiving this year. Wouldn't that be perfect? If it was like last year here where it snowed Thanksgiving night. I would absolutely love that. Snow before then? Not so much... unless I have the cute winter weather apparel to go with it!

Last night my friend Jessica and I went to see a visiting writer at ASU. Her name is Adrienne LeBlanc (sp?) and she's the author of Random Family. Though I haven't actually read the book yet, her talk was incredibly interesting and I think it'd be worth looking in to. She studied and basically lived with this "random family" of people for ten years starting in the mid-eighties. Oh, and did I mention the "head of the family" was a heroine dealer? Not just a dealer, he ran the show, if you know what I mean. No, not exactly appropriate material, but it's such an interesting story. She focuses more so on the love scenes of the whole fiasco rather than the poverty, drug dealing, and so forth. Hearing about her experience of living in such an environment was incredibly inspiring and scary. Don't worry. I'm not getting any ideas. It was just nice to know that it really does take some authors a decade to write a book. Although her genre of journalism literature is a little different, it's still inspiring.

After the reading I got home and began re-writing Missing You. Not entirely, but I do think it needs to focus more on Pam rather than myself. It's hard to do without coming off aa just walking down memory lane, but with the interviews/stories from others and letters and such I really think it's going to work better this way. Who knows. I want to have a draft done by April or so. I know that seems a long ways off, but it's somewhat realistic. Adrienne said it took her 18 months to actually write the book; the rest of the time was research. She said the majority of the 18 months was spent on the first 40 pages. Since I already have 25, I'm hoping it won't take me 18 months. If it does, though, then so be it. What else am I going to do after graduation? ;).

Another thing I'm excited about is Clark and I actually getting involved in our church. Yes, it's pretty late in the game. But, now is better than never. We already have two small groups we're going to check out and I have a friend who volunteers in the nursery who said she can help me do the same. I know it may sound lame to some of you, but it's definitely something Clark and I have been missing out on for some time. (Don't worry, Mom. I can already hear your I told you so ;). )

Well, time to do some homework before class. This weekend is going to be full of projects, research, and studying... but c'est la vie. As long as I make it to Thanksgiving, I think I'll be OK.

It was much pleasanter at home, when one wasn't always growing larger and smaller, and being ordered about by mice and rabbits.

Today I feel like I've accomplished a lot. I've finished the laundry, switched our bathrooms around, cleaned all of our bathrooms, vacuumed the upstairs, dusted the downstairs, make flash cards for a midterm, read a chapter for creative writing, contacted my group for theatre history, looked up slam poetry for oral interpretation, gone to the grocery store, taken Luna for a walk, done my Bible study, journaled, read my one year Bible, read a chapter out of my current "fun" read, and I still intend to vacuum the downstairs, clean the kitchen, and make ginger snaps for Clark.

Oh, yes, I'm that good.

Well, I am when I want to be. It seems I have days where I'm blessed with never ending energy and actually use it wisely. Then there are days where I'm blessed with never ending energy but I don't want to use it. Today was the first, thank goodness. I really needed it to be because I have plenty of homework/studying/personal things to take care of before fall break. I have to admit I'm the tiniest bit stressed out preparing for it, which isn't helping my school work load, but I'll get over it. I'm really hoping that I still get work done over break even though I'll have a visitor, possibly visitors. I think I'm over stressing about it right now because I still have all this cleaning to do and homework to finish and midterms to take, but I think once it's here I'll be relieved and not stressed at all... at least that's what I'm hoping.

I'm feeling a little stretched thin. Yesterday I had a wonderful afternoon/evening with my friend Nikki and we both talked about how tired we are. I feel like we're one in the same when it comes to friends and family: we do as much as possible to make them happy, even if that means sacrificing some of our personal time. I really don't mind it, today's just one of those days where I desperately wished I had mostly used it for homework and relaxation instead of cleaning and running errands. What's that quote from the 2010 Alice? "You're either too small, or too tall." I think that's how it goes... and that's how I'm feeling. I'm feeling like I'm either too busy or not busy at all... and I wish I could just have some sort of balance that would allow me to feel rested and prepared for nearly anything. It would be much better than being ordered about by "mice and rabbits."

Clark is always worried that I'm going to get restless everywhere. Like, it seems every few months or every few years or what have you I get this itch for a change. I positively crave it. It probably comes from growing up in a family that moved every few years, and then when Clark and I were first married we were moving at least once a year. I suppose that's probably it. But... I get these itches to make something different. In high school I would rearrange the furniture in my room, or cut my hair, or dye my hair, or just do something to make me feel like I did something. I know... repetitive.

Since Clark and I have been married I've done the same. First I chopped my hair off, then I pierced my nose, then we moved, then I joined a sorority, then I dyed my hair, then we got a kitten, then I dropped a sorority (when Clark was at boot camp), then we moved, then I dyed my hair, then we got a puppy, then I dyed my hair, then we painted our office, then Clark made me a desk, then I got a new scrap book, then I dyed my hair... the list goes on.

Yes, dying my hair seems to be the only thing that's pretty much consistent.

But you see what I mean? I always feel the need to make a change. I told Clark, though, I think the changes will be a lot more subtle when we finally have a home. I mean after we're done moving with the Corps and we finally pick a place to settle and buy a house and all that good stuff... then I feel like I'll be making smaller changes. Who knows. Maybe a baby (DOWN THE ROAD) will be the first to calm me, or maybe a baby will make it worse. I have no idea... but I really do believe that once we have a real home I'll be a little more relaxed. Gee... that's only who-knows-how-many-years down the road....

Well, cooking always relaxes me, so I think I'm going to go make those ginger snaps. Don't tell Clark, though. It's a surprise :)

No wonder you're late. Why, this watch is exactly two days slow!

It's been one of those weeks. I am just so thankful it's Friday, though I'm sorry to report I'm terribly bored for a Friday night. I always make it a goal to read on nights like this, but then it seems so quiet just reading a book. I really want to go rent a movie or something, but I have no motivation to leave the house when I'm already in my pajamas.

Yes, I said pajamas. At 7:40pm. On a Friday night.

Go me.

This afternoon my friend Nikki came over and we observed how we love being "old women" together. We just sat around enjoying hot tea and blueberry muffins. How amazing is that? Just to sit and talk and enjoy each other's company. Our generation has such a hard time doing that. We always have to be doing something. As if that's going to take enough time to distract us from our mundane lives. Eventually they're going to wake up and realize that they can't go on ignoring communication forever. That's what I think it is. Texts, e-mails, facebook messages... they all make relationships and communication so much less than it actually is. Well, yesterday and today I was able to thoroughly enjoy having good relationships with friends. I need to make a habit of doing that more often...

Last night Clark and I drove to Johnson City, TN to see my dearest friend Becca as Cathy in a production of The Last Five Years. It was a heart-wrenching performance and I am SO proud of Becca. Afterwards we went out with her, her boyfriend (Jonathan), and two of their friends to Applebees and we were actually social! I was so proud of us. I even stayed up past 1am. That is insane for me... especially on a school night. I'm like a combination of a middle-schooler and an old woman most of the time. Up around six of seven and in bed between nine and eleven. Yep. I'm that bad. I can't help it. I love my sleep... and I know I can't concentrate if I don't get enough of it. This week, though, I felt like I was constantly lacking sleep.

Starting Tuesday I had some sort of bug that made me miss class. I was achy, had a low-grade fever, had a cough... all of that lovely stuff that comes with season changes. Luckily it didn't last long, though I'm still incredibly tired and have a random cough. It seems Clark and I can never stay healthy because we're constantly passing one thing back and forth and back and forth. He had it first, then I did, and now he has it again. Poor dear. Ah, well. Hopefully we'll get over it eventually. Anyway, because of being sick I rest constantly but still feel like I need more rest. Hopefully this weekend isn't too jam-packed with friends and studying for midterms, because I want as much rest as possible. Is that awful of me?

I've been feeling sluggish lately. Don't get me wrong, I have motivation-- but if I don't act on it as soon as it hits me, I lose it. It goes to sock world and I'm stuck feeling all yucky again because the motivation came and went. It's obviously nobody's fault but my own, but I can't seem to stick with it if I even hesitate just a few moments. I know... that sounds like an excuse. It feels like I'll get these waves of energy and ideas where all I want to do is be creative in some way, and if I don't sit down and write, or read, or draw, or scrapbook, or take pictures, or something at that EXACT moment... I lose it. Then, I'm stuck watching alternating re-runs of House and Reba. What I REALLY want to watch is the last season of The Tudors that just came out, but I promised Clark I'd wait for him.

I'm also ready for next week. My best friend from Michigan who I have known since age five is flying out again, Serena. She's coming the 20th and staying until Sunday (my fall break). There's also the chance that my parents and younger sister are also going to come visit. I haven't found out if they're all coming yet, but it is giving me more moments of motivation to clean. I have sadly discovered that it's 50% my fault that the house is a disaster 99% of the time. I should have realized, of course, but I'm always so focused on school, cooking, or doing something for myself that I forget about cleaning. Well, at least, the in-depth cleaning. Dusting, vacuuming, wiping down counters and all that easy stuff happens on a regular basis. Everything else, unfortunately, like cleaning out sinks or bathtubs (I know, gross) get left for some time. I don't let it get too bad, though... don't get the wrong idea. I just wish Clark would do some of the nasty work... but he only ever volunteers to do the easy stuff.

I'm so thankful we're actually having an autumn this year. It's almost throwing me off walking outside and seeing color all around me, instead of desolated trees predicting ridiculous amounts of snow in the near future. It does concern me slightly that we're under a frost advisory until Saturday night, but it may not happen. Maybe our first snow won't be until late November, or even not until December! Wouldn't that be something. I can't say I'm in a hurry for snow to get here at all, but I'm starting to get that itch for the holidays I always start to get around Halloween. I mean, I'm not big into Halloween at all, but it leads to the holiday season beginning. I say holiday season generally, meaning Thanksgiving and then Christmas time and then New Years. Halloween starts the trend, even if it's just an excuse for people to play dress up.

I promised myself I'd write today because I haven't written anything for myself in a while. Well, at least I haven't written anything that I wanted to write. I've had a serious problem lately with writer's block. I can't just sit down and think of words to rearrange and make a story out of, or make a story better with those words. No. I've just sat in front of a computer and written down mopey thoughts or nothing at all. I wish I could shake it. I just keep hoping that with a long vacation or graduation comes more motivation to really write. I know I need to take advantage of my newly renovated writing room now, since we're most likely moving in May, but I can't seem to get myself to focus because there's still so much more I want to do with it. Maybe that's just another excuse for my writer's block.

I think I'm more than two days slow.

When I get home I shall write a book about this place...

Saturday is finally here. This week seemed a lot longer than usual. I had so much going on and so many things not going my way, but no matter. It's finally the weekend. Even if things don't go precisely as planned on the weekend, it's OK because it doesn't affect too much. It doesn't bother certain school work or classes or anything like that. So, it shall be just fine.

When I have the time I've been watching movies about writers and re-reading some of my favorite books. All of them lead to the obvious. For example, in Little Women (the movie), Joe first tells Beth that the key to writing is to write what you do not know. However, she learns from her Professor that it is best to writer from the heart. I'm sure I've gone on about this before, but I think sometimes I am so focused on writing for an audience that I do not stop to think to write from the heart. For example, one of the books I am writing Missing You, doesn't exactly read like it's from the heart... and it desperately needs to be. I've just decided that in whatever spare time I have I'm going to go back and start re-writing bits and pieces of it. I want it to really read like a memoir, not a badly written fictionalized story. I want it to touch people and make them understand what everyone was going through at that time. I want them to love and hurt the way everyone that was involved did. If you don't know what I'm talking about, you'll just have to be on the look out for the book ;).

I've started looking around for writing contests. It isn't easy at all, but I've figured out that if I want to prove I can make a living at it, I need to start somewhere. I want writing to be my life, because it's something I can always do from the home, and it's something that I'm always doing anyway. I want people to enjoy what I'm writing, even if it's just from a blog.

Having my writing room helps me. It's such an extraordinary room. I know I haven't posted recent pictures but part of that is because it's a disaster right now. There are crumpled up pieces of paper all over the place and a blanket in the middle of the floor and a coat... it's my room, so there's not always a reason to keep it clean. When I want to write, though, the mess tends to add to the craziness in my mind. Like Renee Zellweger says as Beatrix Potter in Miss Potter, "I have pigs running amuck up there." It seems that I am the same way. I constantly have some new idea or story running through my head. If only they were all fully developed and all I had to do was write them down!

Although today Clark and I are supposed to go hiking and then attend Oktoberfest, I think it may turn into a somewhat lazy Saturday. Clark's been fighting a cold which he insists is allergies, but I know better. He always gets sick when the weather changes, and it may be best for him just to rest today. If that's the case, I will still probably insist we go up on the parkway for a little bit. I have been wanting to take some pictures of the leaves and such. We're actually having an autumn this year and I don't want to miss capturing it. It's days like we've been having recently that makes me think I may actually miss the high country when we move... but if we have a terrible winter, I know I'll quickly change my mind.



I know this may not read quite as entertaining as it should. This morning I'm feeling a bit "blah" due to actually sleeping past 6am. I woke up at six and actually went back to sleep and didn't get up until eight. For me, that's pretty impressive.